I’m awake, cold and hungry. It’s raining again, so I can at least drink from the trickle that is making me so cold. A mixed blessing that one. My foot is still trapped, and painful. Maybe I should be grateful I can still feel something. Hopefully it is a good sign.
Another day. Silence except for the occasional groan and little shifts in the rubble. How long can someone survive like this? Why does no one realise I’m missing? I even miss Philip calling, then he would realise I’m missing. Am I beginning to lose my common sense? But he does love me, I’m sure of that. Maybe I’m being punished for hurting him?
My phone has been silent for ages. Probably the battery is now dead. How long before I’m also dead?
I don’t want to die. I want what most people want; a happy life, someone to love who loves me, a home, children. I can’t die yet. Maybe I threw away my last chance so now my life is over?
Ok Philip, I’m sorry, I’ll take you back if you come and rescue me. How’s that for a promise? Now please please just come and get me out of here.
I don’t think I’ll ever be warm again. I could eat a horse I’m so hungry. They say you stop feeling hunger after a while. Then you know it’s almost time to die. Maybe I should stop drinking the water, you die faster from lack of water than you do from starvation.
How long can someone survive like this?
I was asleep again. There is still light, or is it another day? I’ve lost count of time. Now those lines from Shakespeare just skirt my mind, who didn’t want it to be dawn? Juliet, Romeo. One of them. Well I had my early love, and he died just as I was finding out how fickle his love was. No Romeo and Juliet story – my life. Shakespeare’s lovers always ended up happy. So maybe mine is more like one of his tragedies. Maybe I’m Lady Macbeth, killing the King. But then Leo is my lifelong friend, I couldn’t kill him. Huh! If he was such a good friend he’d have realised I’m missing and send Philip to rescue me.
I’m free, running through the field at the edge of the wood at the house. It’s school holidays. All the cousins are together. We are playing hide and seek. I’m hiding in the rubble. What rubble, why is the house not standing? Why doesn’t someone realise I’m still hiding. I want my mummy. I’m crying and she doesn’t come.
No, I’m dreaming, drifting off. That’s not real. Hang on to reality. But reality is so horrid, cold, darkish with cracks of light that let in the rain. The crying was real, now I can’t stop. I’m scared, cold and alone. Trapped.
It’s really dark again. How silly of me to be scared of the dark when I was young. It’s the day that catches you. You go places and the buildings fall on you, and then you die, cold and wet and hungry and alone.
Am I going to die?