Second generation friends


Mentorship, leadership, being the senior in a relationship. When does it end? When does the junior become the equal?

It is a status change that fascinates me. Watching people come into the knowledge, experience or whatever is needed to place them on equal footing with the senior.

Sometimes, even more fascinating is watching the previous “senior” and how they react as the other person grows and develops and is ready to be.

You sometimes see it in couples where the male has ruled, dominated for so long. Then Ill health or age and diminishing capabilities make him more and more dependent on her. Some just love watching her take over and look after them, others (the ones I suspect are control freaks) become grumpy and nasty.

Over the years in my industry I have watched many youngsters come in, grow, develop and become masters of their area. Personally I usually find it a pleasure to see this. The flowering of someone who has put in he effort to achieve.

But I think the greatest pleasure in this area is to see someone you have known since a tiny baby, grow up, become an adult. Then if you are lucky, the love in the relationship becomes the love of equals, friendship is real, and the satisfaction in seeing them competent, succeeding at their dreams, being happy is so great.

Today I feel like going to all of those, my second generation friends to give them a hug, and then go to sit with my first generation friends, with a coffee and chat happily over how far these beloved next generation ave come. And of ourselves to congratulate the first generation on their success in raising these wonderful people.

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26 thoughts on “Second generation friends

  1. Yes I have some too, and they are, well most of them, delightful people. As for my mentors, no I have never felt like an equal I still feel that psychological age difference. With the young ones I am the wiser, with the elder I can still learn

  2. I feel that way when I see some of my past pupils and discover what they have managed to do with their lives. It gives me a great deal of satisfaction to know that in some small way I was part of who they have become.

  3. so very true and very pertinent to me right now with with my girls. One lives in a flat and one is about to move overseas, and while I have longed for them to be independent I still find it hard to not leap in and take care of everything for them…sigh, even BIGGER SIGH

  4. It gives me such pleasure to see how my children have made their way in the world, and even more so when they acknowledge that their upbringing had a hand in their success. 😉

  5. What about option c) ah, someone to show the ropes then while they do their thing I can do even less than I am doing now! My last boss was like that. Can be good, can be bad – boum!

  6. I never had a mentor, but I do remember idolising Guillermo Vilas and watching everything he did (Argentinian tennis star). He was awesome. I considered him a real man.

  7. I so love this post. It shows how much family and friendship means and how we are all interconnected with the people who had been an amazing inspiration in our lives. These are beautiful, “But I think the greatest pleasure in this area is to see someone you have known since a tiny baby, grow up, become an adult. Then if you are lucky, the love in the relationship becomes the love of equals, friendship is real, and the satisfaction in seeing them competent, succeeding at their dreams, being happy is so great.” Thanks…to great friends and family!

  8. My half-brother and two half-sisters are 16, 20 and 25 years younger than me, respectively. Today we are all adults and it still amazes me that they grew up so fast and that they are actually people I would like to be friends with even if they weren’t family.

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