Watching three friends of mine all battling with circumstances that leave them drained and in emotional pain makes me wonder about the source of the pain.
In each case they seem to be looking for affirmation of themselves from someone who seems not to care, or in one case, to actively dislike them.
How or why do we give others such power over our self-image that without their approval we feel unworthy, sad or similar negative emotions?
I think if we could find out how to prevent this we’d have the answer to so much unhappiness.
BUT then – would we also be removing some of life’s happiness?
Advertisements
You’re so right about needing/wanting affirmation about ourselves. Its something I question about myself often. If we could learn that we are own best affirmers and that should be good enough, because really, who knows us better than we know ourselves.
*hugs*
We damage our self image when we hand it ove to someone else
Eish..:(
Dish indeed
I am exhausted
Oops the iPad changes eish to dish
😉 – I have so had it with devices that think they know better than we what we’re trying to say!
me too. i need to find out how to turn it off
I would hate to find myself back there.
Oh me too nzwa
Life is hard sometimes. For the people who least deserve it 😦
And for those least prepared to deal with it
I can’t speak for others, but I no longer give my power away to others . . . and I have NOT relinquished my happiness as a result.
My post today touches upon this . . . our false self is concerned with our reputation with us. Our essential self is NOT:
The real you . . . the essential you . . . is connected to the loving source of all. When you feel that connection, all your extraneous worries, fears, doubts, pain, and self-imposed suffering fade away.
Once we realize that we are ENOUGH as we are . . . the desire to impress others diminishes until we barely hear the applause or jeers.
exactly, its part of growing up, not to need affirmation of ourselves from others. to enjoy when it is given, but not to feel unworthy or done down when you don;t get it
How or why do we give others such power over our self-image that without their approval we feel unworthy, sad or similar negative emotions? – Is it because we (perhaps unknowingly) have “unworthy” stamped on the forehead of our self-image and we’re longing for others to show us we’re wrong about ourselves (i.e., that we are worthy, loveable, etc.)?
As for your final question – no, I think we’d be adding to life’s happiness.
How we see ourselves……
I read in a book yesterday – you can’t be really happy, until you’ve had sorrow.
Not that we actively look for sorrow, it’s just hard to let go of somebody that you knew happiness with at some stage.
Think the trick is to go away before the happiuness turns to sorrow.
Hope your buddies get through this in one piece Sar…
Maybe, but then maybe you would only have been unhappy when they died