I stopped and stared, there was the biggest darkest angel I had ever seen. He glowed with an inner light that drew me towards him. The Most Senior took my hand and led me towards him. He turned to face us and smiled. I just wanted him never to stop smiling. Then he put out his arms, and I was enfolded in the warmest, kindest hug.
The Most Senior smiled and said, “Well then I’ll leave you here, you are in good hands.”
He looked at me and said, “Little one, why do you want baby duty?”
I replied, “I’m tired of so many adults who are mean, greedy and sometimes just plain evil.”
He looked sad and said “That’s not enough. You could stop doing any guardian duties you know.”
We sat together on a cloud, rather a racy one, all streaky across the sky, moving so that we watched the world moving under us. He talked of his own history. An Albino baby, cruelly mutilated while alive for muti, until in agony he died on a cold and lonely hillside. Discovering that he could be a guardian, and choosing his own mother. To discover she was still living with the man who had killed him. His horror at adults and his move to children guarding and how he had discovered his way with them.
I sat and thought for a long time. He went away and came back again. Eventually I turned and said, “You can help mould a person’s soul at its most impressionable when they are babies and children. To make people who are happy and loving. That is what I think I can do.”
He smiled and took my hand. “Now there is a reason to go towards something, not to run away from something else.” We have one just for you. She will only live a short time, her parents are good enough people. She has already started showing some signs of a bad temper and irritability. She needs someone to soothe her heart as we think she senses she will never grow up. Will you take her on?”
That was how I met little Si. She was a pretty enough baby, but her little thoughts showed through somehow. I sat next to her bed, and put my hand on her head. There was turmoil, she KNEW she would die, she saw her older siblings running and playing and wanted to do the same. Then I realised a demon had been there, stirring her up with the wrong thoughts.
Little by little over the days I soothed her, made her think of loving her parents and siblings. The first time she smiled at her bigger sister when she carried her, the sister would not put her down, and the pair sat on the ground, with the big sister talking gently and kindly to her. The magic began.
As the days went by, she became the centre of the family. The littlest; who could bring happiness just by her smile. The terrible tightness in her soul eased. She genuinely became happy. Her father loved to stand with her in his arm in the dawn and show her the sunrise. He talked to her of how she would live, growing up and one day having children of her own to love. She just stretched out her little hand and touched his face.
When she became ill, all of the family’s angels had a difficult time, helping the family focus on love and kindness to each other, and not on despair. Reminding the parents that the other children also needed attention was the hardest. Yet when they couldn’t be with little Si, I was there, soothing her, telling her of the peace and happiness to come.
The weeks of her illness were the hardest I have ever had, yet also the best. Watching her dying bring the family closer together. We all worked on the parents, helping them each realise that the other was not to blame, helping them remember their love for each other.
When I finally took her hand and led her away, she was ready.
I sat on a cloud, lonely and sad, I missed Si. Then there he was, the big dark angel, walking with a graceful young angel, smiling together. The smaller angel came to me and hugged me. She smiled, “You were the presence in my mind, to company, the comfort. Thank you.”
My little Si, now so full of gentle strength. She said, “We can go together, there are twins needing guarding. Would you show me the ropes please”
And so we began together, Si and I doing twins duty together. She often says I taught her so much, yet it was that little baby with her first smile who taught me loving.